Apathy

Apathy is, as defined by Wikipedia (Is the best), a state of indifference, or the suppression of emotions such as concern, excitement, motivation, and passion. I have been fairly apathetic about everything lately, and some people make excuses to justify their lack of time spent doing anything worthwhile.  Well I have decided  that my excuses are not to justify as if I had done nothing wrong, but rather a confession and evaluation of my flaws. To begin, I must evaluate my apathy. It starts with this blog, I haven't posted in months. Second, my friends, close friends (I do have some), where has the time gone. Thirdly, schoolwork, as I am a senior and should not be getting senioritis until later on. And I can guarantee there are various other flaws, but I feel as if I must start with these three.
I do enjoy writing (Or typing), putting words down onto paper (Or a computer screen) and spilling out my thoughts and desires in hope that I may make a difference in someone's life as many authors have done in mine. I have many distractions that come into my mind as I write, or as I don't write. Even as I type right now I get distracted by the many news stories on facebook (Curse you Mark Zuckerberg!). Sometimes we all just don't care. Or have suppressed our emotions by replacing them with other things, useless things. Look! A duck!

But you know what I mean (I'm making the assumption that everyone reading this is semi-intelligent, hooray for you). Main point, I can't do what what I really want because I'm too busy doing things I think I wanna do, suppressing my true emotions, therefore apathy. I'm pretty shure (Mic joke!) this goes without saying that the same things applies to your relationships as well.

As you grow you find people that think you're a pretty chipper person and you return the feeling... sometimes. In my experience, this has come with great price. I make a great friend, but then somehow get out of touch. "Somehow" implying that I had no clue why. But now I do. I put great emphasis on things such as my electronics and my comfort over the things that truly matter most. Many a times when I find myself at home with friends, I will frequently ignore them as if the computer in more important. I then must quickly shut the computer due to my habits. And also the apathy of actually building up the relationships comes into play too. When friends invite me to hang, I more often than not find myself wanting to do nothing (I'm sorry to all) rather than getting up and moving out. This all had lead me down a seemingly never-ending spiral. I say no, so I lose friends, I lose friends, I become more insecure, I become more insecure, I make less friends, I make less friends, I wonder why people don't like me, I wonder why people don't like me, I pre-judge people and their motives, etc. Whereas this isn't so true as it used to be (Praise Jesus!), it does make me ponder why I did it? And why I continue to be apathetic about things, especially the more significant subjects. Bringing up subjects... Me and School have a very awkward relationship.

Where do I start? Me and School hit it off pretty early. We had a fairly playful relationship early on. I like her, she liked me. We played during kindergarten, art one day, house the next. I was the manly cop that came home with the money, she was the patient wife that always made me dinner and never forget to bring my "banana gun" to work. As we grew, she became so much more educational and involved, and while I knew she was good for me, I refused because it was all too difficult. 

Too difficult? God knows what would've happened to this world and everything else if we all decided not to do something because it was "too difficult". We'd all be dead. But even though I may dread learning something as I learn it, I do sure love it in the after thought. Just as we go through trials, we hurt, we burn, we come through in the end and we know what to do and what not to do. And this is why I can firmly say, next to Pride, Apathy is the most dangerous trait anyone can have.

People call it being lazy, the Bible calls it slothfulness, my mom calls it the devil. Apathy is great enemy to all. An enemy to those who want to be great someday, to those who are called to greater things, as us Christians are, and even those who intend to live. This is a wake up call to the masses, we must fix what we have not done, rather than what we have done because in actually we have done nothing. And to the countless numbers of teenagers out there. There is no such thing as "teenager", it's a word people invented to further narrow down age, not ability and maturity, you're either a child or an adult. Grow up America. We can no longer face what is before us unless we actually perform some task outside of ourselves. Diligence is the key. And our motivation should be Jesus, the one who saved us from all sin, including Apathy.

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I gave this post no title. You can try to guess why, but you might be wasting your time. Just like the times we waste on all the other things that we think have meaning and purpose when in fact they do not...

Why do we waste our time? I could go on ranting and tell you that there is nothing to worthwhile to read, but still you persist. A good amount of my time is spent just wondering what I will put down. Some of it may make no sense, maybe the whole body is without purpose and maybe it amuses you, but if there is no moral, no purpose, nothing holding you there except maybe pure boredom and this is all filler.

Everything I am telling you is useless. My words are completely empty.

But more ranting could do you good, you need some randomness in your life, probably your life is pretty dull right about now. So is mine.

That was pointless, yet you still read, looking for a cheap thrill, looking for something to matter that doesn't. If nothing is going to come of what I write, or what we do, or the things we say, or the way we live our lives... Why do we do them?!

Take a step back, regardless whether you believe there is a purpose to life, think about this... What is there to gain from a believing that our life is purposeless? What is there to gain by believing there is no God? What is there to gain by believing there is some crazy God who forgot about a long time ago? What hope is there? Why do people continue to accept hopeless and idiotic ideologies and beliefs? What logical sense is there is believing these things? What sense is there is believing there is only hopelessness, despair, and disappointment? Why do these things give you satisfaction?

Pointless. When there could be purpose? Which would you rather choose?

Living a life without the hope of something more is idiotic.

I might have lied, this could be about something, but only if you make it to be.

I encourage you to stop reading. Turn off the computer, before I actually say something worthwhile.

Purpose, it exists. And in the most beautiful way I might add.

Purpose in Jesus, living through Him by living for Him, He is everything that is good, pure, righteous, morally right, joyous, merciful, and wonderful in this universe, He created it all. He blessed us by giving us this wonderful to take care of it and enjoy it. Living with and for God is the purpose. And doing what we are created to do is the thing that will give us the most joy will it not?

"God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing."
-C.S Lewis

"I sometimes wonder whether all pleasures are not substitutes for joy."
-C.S. Lewis

"He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn of all creation. For by Him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things were created through Him and for Him." 
-1 Colossians 1:15-16


Let us run to the arms of our Creator, our Father, our friend.We try to create meaning and purpose through pointless objectives. We try live creation without the Creator. We try to maintain life while ignoring the prescence of the Life Giver. He gave His life for us, the least we can do is give our lives back to Him.

He Loves you, He Loves me, He died, so we could live... Is that not the essence of Love? Isn't the Truth worth fighting for? Worth living for? Is that pointless?


-A Boy on a Journey

Essentials Kit :)

Maybe one day we could live our life off of so little.

All jokes aside, people do it everyday. People are left with even less in fact. While we sit down and complain about homework and work and how "I'm so busy I only have time for me". If you really think, we could live with less. People in Haiti do it all the time, and I bet people in Japan are doing it too. We rush to the scene when something traumatic happens (Which is Wonderful), but the rest of the world is in dismay and we turn a blind eye. I sit here on my computer blogging, realizing that this is what I often do. It's been said over and over again, maybe we should take a class on it, that always seems to work.

I guess my whole point in saying this is that it's getting to me, I think I may  be looking beyond my own life and comfort and onto the well-being of others. I think if everyone cared like Jesus wants us to do, His hands and feet would reach out. People's lives would be forever changed, and then what need for a Socialist, Communist, or Democractic government would there be. If God reigned in our lives. What would become of this broken world? It's ideal. An ideal that I want in my life.

-Self-indulged

A Blog of Momentous Proportions

So I thought it would be kind of cool to blog thoughts and life experiences. I figured I enjoy typing a little more than I did writing, so what the heck! I think one of the biggest things about doing this is that I need to keep up with it, maybe even make things interesting so people will actually read what I type, maybe I'll be able to make a difference in someone's life.


So the first thing I needed was a name for my blog. The name was inspired by 1 Corinthians 13:1 and also the name of an album by the band "The Rocket Summer" also inspired by the same verse.

 "If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.  Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things." (1 Cor. 13:1-7)

This is what drives me, I do not just follow religion, but filling relationship with my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

Another thing that bothers me is the dismissal of religion, I hear many Christians say, "Oh, I'm not religious, but I do have a relationship with Jesus", without thinking what religion really is. So I took the liberty of looking up the definition of Religion and think about what it actually means to be religious, a healthy type of religious of course.

According to Wikipedia, "Religion is a belief of some superhuman power or powers, in particular a god or gods, which usually involve obedience, reverence, and worship; and as part of a system which defines a code of living, especially as a way of achieving spiritual or material improvement"

Religion is a belief. So my question is why so many christians decide to write off being religious altogether. Why can't christians state that they are religious and also have a deep relationship with the living and breathing God that created the universe? If anybody can answer this for me, how exactly we came to this, please tell me.

So what is it called when people say that we focus too much on religion?

I firmly believe that is when we focus too much on the law, and attempt to follow God's impossible standards to a T. This can leave someone feeling guilty and empty, with the thought that everything they do is wrong or maybe even stupid. Too much Law. Not enough Grace. The Grace of God, Unmerited Favor. Knowing that God will forgive us, no matter how wrong or "unusual" our sin can be. What we need is Grace. Among the most important things.

-Logan "Nogal" Welliver

Someday.

     I sometimes find it impossible to live life. And somedays I would rather give up. But someday life will be lived TO me, someday it will be different.

     The same things will pass me by, but each time they do they will seem different. The type of people that once annoyed me will become the closest of friends. The things that once ticked me off will soon make me fresh. Someday, the things that drive me will no longer drive me, but rather they will enable me to break down walls. Someday before the sky falls in, I will fall in treachery. But it will not be long or even physically painful treachery, but a quick and swift knife to the heart. The knife will leave me bleeding, but will cut out the cancer of the misery and lonliness, leaving me with but a scar. The scar will shape into a picture, one of Love and Hope that is the One... The One I Love.

     Someday my life will be lived not be my reserves, but rather out of my abundance. My abundance that is so overflowing that the only way it is control is by giving it all away.

     Someday I will no longer have a home, but rather a constant gathering for everyone, I will spend my days serving the people, the people that He created.

Someday soon, there will be an uprising, an uprising of hearts among my friends and family.

Someday I hope to be, a model for all to see. Be one of conscience and chivalry.

Someday, it ought to be easier to say "Yes" to the things that God shows me.

Someday I want to speak boldy and proudly the things that I believe.

     And someday, I would love for the world to see, the Truth that holds us, the Love that shows us, the Grace that breaks, the mercy that takes us, to places far beyond what eyes can see, to a place of Glory, at the foot of a throne far more fathomable than any of us will ever know.